Ways to Supercharge Your Intuition: Partner Dancing
Partner dancing helps strengthen your intuition. Photo by Isaiah McClean on Unsplash
January is upon us, and you probably know what that means – New Year’s resolutions.
New Year’s resolutions, however, don’t have to mean sentencing yourself to grueling exercise regimens or trendy, tasteless diets.
To kick off 2021, I’m dedicating all of January’s weekly blog posts to strengthening a priceless, albeit underutilized, muscle – your intuition.
Let’s kick things off with an overview on partner dancing. Read on to find out which dance style is best for you, what to expect as a newbie dancer, and why music and movement are perfect for developing your intuition.
Before You Begin…
What is your intuition?
The moon is a common symbol for the human intuition. Photo by Stephen Walker on Unsplash
As the ability to instinctively acquire knowledge and understanding, your intuition is housed in your brain’s emotional processing organs (your limbic system). It governs your unconscious and it helps you detect subtleties in your environment, subtleties that go unseen by your brain’s logical reasoning center.
A finetuned intuition can also save your life, as it can alert you to dangerous people and situations long before said dangerous people or situations can harm you.
Social conditioning, however, teaches us to ignore and disconnect from our gut instinct. The reasons for why are complicated; to summarize, intuitiveness is discounted because as a trait rooted in emotion, our inherently misogynistic societies see it as feminine and therefore weak and irrational.
developing Your Intuition through Partner Dancing
What is partner dancing?
Partner dancing is the art of coordinated movement between two people to music. It usually involves an active role, where the lead guides the couple and initiates dance steps, and a receptive role, where the follow completes and embellishes the lead’s suggestions. While lead and follow functions adhere to traditional gender roles, any gender can perform any role.
There are countless partner dance styles to choose from; based on this blog’s readership, here’s my recommendations, listed from least to most difficult:
Swing
Swing is an umbrella term for dance styles that developed following the advent of American jazz music in the 1920s - 1950s. These styles include Lindy Hop, Charleston, West Coast Swing, and more. As a wildly popular social dance (seriously, dance classes can easily reach hundreds of participants if you live in a large city), you’ve probably encountered Swing before, in the form of its distinctive lifts, spins, and flips.
Fun is part and parcel with Swing, as the dance features bouncy 6-count and 8-count step patterns. Out of all the dances listed in this article, Swing is the easiest to learn; a single lesson is all you’ll need to get dancefloor-ready.
Who’s it best for?
Home to a vibrant, diverse, and welcoming community, Swing is perfect for anyone who’s always struggled with fitting in. Neurodivergents, LGBTQ+, and seniors are especially good matches for the Swing dance community. Swing is also a great entry point if you’re arriving without a music, dance, or athletic background, as it offers a quick and measurable path to advancement.
Salsa
It’s fiery. It’s caliente. It’s Salsa.
Originating from San Juan and Havana in the early 20th century, Salsa is an amalgamation of Puerto Rican, Cuban, Dominican, African, and American jazz dances.
Characterized by quick footwork, swaying hips, and flamboyant embellishments with the arms, Salsa is danced face-to-face, in 4/4-time, to two measures of eight beats each. Its rhythm is dictated by two percussion instruments, the clave, two wooden sticks, and the congas, tall, narrow hand drums hailing from Cuba.
Difficulty wise, Salsa is deceptive. Though leads and follows begin Salsa on equal footing, Salsa’s difficulty inverses over time, where leads experience a frustrating initial plateau before exponential advancement, and where follows experience a fast and rewarding initial learning curve before later plateauing.
The infamous “beginner’s hell” chart. Source: Eddie the Salsa Freak
Who’s it best for?
Salsa events are like huge parties, filled to the brim with tight skirts, glistening skin, and exotic men who aren’t afraid to make the first move, which makes the dance a fitting choice for singles and wallflowers seeking to up their confidence level. Compared to Bachata, Zouk, and Argentine Tango, Salsa is also the most accessible entry point for Latin dance.
Ballroom
With origins as early as the 16th century, Ballroom is an umbrella term for traditional partner dance forms, where couples use step-patterns to express the characteristics of music.
There are two ballroom dance styles, Smooth, which includes the Foxtrot, Waltz, and Quickstep, and Rhythm, which includes Samba, Jive, and East Coast Swing.
Ballroom is also divided into three worlds – social, competitive, and exhibition.
Since Ballroom covers a large musical spectrum, its difficulty varies depending on dance style and your own aspirations.
Who’s it best for?
Ballroom tends to attract an older clientele, and is especially popular with established couples who wish to deepen their relationship. Thanks to its diverse dance style offering, Ballroom is also a great choice for those who want to dance, but are unsure of which style to choose.
Argentine Tango
As a partner dance that originated in late 19th century Argentina, Tango is internationally known as the most passionate Latin dance style. Notable for its closed embrace, Tango is home to a storied history, rich social traditions, a distinct musical genre, and sumptuous dancefloor fashions (pencil skirts, zoot suits, and stilettos, anyone?).
Tango, however, does come with a drawback. It’s hard. Really hard. So hard that it can easily take years to develop competency, and even longer to unlock Tango’s secrets. The rewards, however, are worth it if you’re patient and dedicated enough, as Tango offers many health benefits, such as improved balance, flexibility, a killer set of legs, and reduced stress.
Who’s it best for?
Tango’s aforementioned difficulty makes it a fitting choice for those who have a love for discipline and plenty of time (and funds) to dedicate towards developing as a dancer. Its subdued nature also makes it a great choice for introverts, highly sensitive people, and the intellectually curious.
Compared to other dances, however, I find that Tango communities can be hit or miss. On one hand, Tango plays host to educated, well-traveled dancers. And on the other, snobbery is a widely reported issue, as is gender imbalance. Tango’s illusion of intimacy and traditional social codes, where dance invitations are accepted or declined via eye contact, also tends to attract those who have problems with real intimacy, problems that can affect your Tango experience if a respective community enables them.
Why does partner dancing strengthen your intuition?
Thinking is the enemy of intuition, and nothing teaches you not to think like partner dancing.
Once you’ve gotten a few classes under your belt, your dance instructor will encourage you to attend a social, where the sky’s the limit in terms of interpreting the music. Most partner dance music features up-tempo instrumentals with passionate lyrics and intricate rhythmic structure, qualities that train dancers to abandon logic and embrace instinct.
And that’s just from the inside. On the outside, partner dancing teaches you to be fully present, to be aware of your body, the body of another, and the space you occupy. It also helps you become cognizant of others’ unvoiced emotional states and provides a healthy outlet for emotional expression.
Your first dance lesson - What to expect?
Partner dancing is for everyone. Photo by John Moeses Bauan on Unsplash
Unfortunately, most dance communities have indefinitely suspended in-person classes and socials (I’m sure you can imagine why). However, once the pandemic ends, partner dancing is guaranteed to return with twice the fervor it had before the Rona reared its ugly head.
When this happens, start your dance journey by seeking out beginners’ classes in your local community. To prepare for your first class:
Dress in breathable clothing.
Eat a meal beforehand.
Ensure your breath and body smell good with deodorant and breath mints.
Wear close-toed shoes. Avoid tread and rubber soles, if you can.
Upon arrival, your instructor(s) will collect payment and registration information before diving straight into the lesson. A typical beginners’ lesson will introduce the following:
Musical structure and counting system
Basic moves, such as pivots, walking, and spins
Correct posture, weight distribution, and pressure
Beginners’ vocabulary
Social etiquette
During the lesson itself, expect to rotate partners multiple times. Don’t worry if you periodically feel lost or awkward; these feelings are normal for all newbie dancers and will pass with experience.
A good dance teacher:
Uses positive reinforcement and feedback to help students build confidence
Encourages partner switching, improvisation, and experimentation
Conducts accessible lessons, where dance vocabulary and technique are demonstrated in ways that are easy to understand, retain, and build upon
Facilitates measurable improvement and has clear parameters for advancement
Acts with integrity and helps newcomers feel welcome
Takes appropriate disciplinary action, if required
A healthy dance community:
Encourages gender neutrality, where everyone can learn leader and follower roles
Ensures that harmful beliefs and behaviors are not tolerated or enabled
Promotes inclusivity through action, where dancers across all demographic lines feel visible, included, and valued
partner Dance Myths, Debunked
Have partner dancing on your post-Covid to-do list, but still on the fence about joining a class? Let me shatter a few reservations for you:
You need a partner. While having a consistent partner will help you advance faster, a partner is not a dancing prerequisite. In fact, many dance teachers frown upon it, as dancing with multiple partners helps you become a well-rounded and more empathetic dancer.
You need to be white, young, and skinny. Partner dancing is for everyone – every age, race, orientation, gender, and body type. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
You need special shoes and clothes. As a beginner dancer, it’s easy to get caught up in acquiring the hottest shoes or showy costumes. And while great for providing a placebo effect, I recommend saving accoutrements for after you’ve reached an advanced beginner level, or after at least six months of consistent classes and practice.
Dance partners sleep with each other. Though partner dancing is a great way to socialize with other singles (and many singles meet romantic partners through dance), you don’t have to date if you don’t want to. The same goes for sex; while sex definitely happens in dance communities, dancing itself doesn’t imply sexual consent.
Do you have dance lessons on your post-Covid to-do list? If so, what’s your preferred style and why?